Wouldn’t you love to look back on this period of time one day and happily see how you invested in your relationship with your Heavenly Father?  Invested in your spiritual growth, and truly gave it your all to prepare your heart and mind for your husband? To one day tell your husband, “It was so important for me to hand my heart to God before I handed it to you. Because knowing the fullness of Christ’s love, can help me show that same love to you.”

My sweetheart and I just celebrated our first anniversary this month. And I’m no expert, and I’m not perfect, but I do know firsthand that there are so many things from your heart as a single girl that you carry over into your heart as a married woman. Marriage doesn’t change your heart, your efforts and God’s hand does. So if there are things in your life you know that you need to work on, marriage will not fix them. Marriage will not satisfy them all. A husband will be there to encourage and support you through that journey, but as wonderful as husbands are, this other person will test those struggles and weak points too! Learn to change your heart and dedicate it to holiness now, so when you do get married, you will be in full practice of where to gain fulfillment, receive healing, and mirror the ultimate love–God’s love–to your man!

Here are 5 things, as a married gal, I have to exercise daily in my marriage! But these five things are things you can work on for your husband now as an unmarried girl. That when you are married you will look back and think “I’m so glad I learned to put these things to practice then!”

5 Ways to Prepare for Marriage

1. Love Others Like Jesus

Marriage is intended to represent the Gospel. And that means loving each other like Jesus loves us. Mercy, grace, patience, and forgiveness are the heartbeat of a healthy, God honoring marriage. Merciful, gracious, patient, and forgiving are all attributes of our Heavenly Father and are the keys to loving your husband like Christ loves him. Being ever willing to be and show these things is ever needed when you join your heart and life with another person. Growth and disputes will be faced, and mercy, grace, patience, and forgiveness will be needed more than you know! Making a point to show Jesus’ love to friends and family when they aren’t the easiest to deal with is a great way to exercise these qualities for your marriage!

2. Learn to Let Go

“…love keeps no record of wrongs…”

1 Corinthians 13:5

We already talked about forgiveness. But I want to talk about it a bit more specifically because its so important as a wife. Your husband, as much as you will love him, will still be a human. And that means he will make mistakes, and he won’t always do right by you. This is where Jesus’ love comes in and forgiveness specifically. Learn to not hold bitterness in your heart. Learn to communicate and not give the silent treatment. Learn to forgive even when this person has not said sorry. Practice forgiveness with those around you who have hurt or wronged you.

3. Learn to be Humble

It isn’t always easy to be the first one to say sorry. Or to admit to being wrong. Or to give 100% when someone doesn’t seem to be giving 100% themselves. But God calls us to humbleness. Be humble now. Especially when it’s hardest to be.

4. Pray for Your Spouse

Allison wrote a beautiful post on praying for your future spouse here. This is definitely something you should get into the habit of doing NOW. Because the prayers should not stop when you are married. Praying for your husband is so important, because Satan attacks him too. He may have no idea right now of the beautiful, sweet girl he has praying for him daily somewhere in the world. But it will mean the world to your husband later when you tell him, “I prayed for you then, and I’m still praying for you now.” Your husband will need the prayers of his wife. Get into the habit of this!!

5. Be in Tune with God

If your heart is not in the right place with The Lord, it will fall short all the more in your relationship with your husband. You won’t have the same strong desire to do the four things above if your heart is not where it should be to begin with. Investing in your relationship with God is investing into your marriage. 

Love goes beyond the cute texts, the engagement ring, the date nights, the roses, the waking up beside your best friend when you are finally married. And preparation for marriage goes beyond the wedding colors, the house you’ll live in, the recipes you’ll learn to cook. Preparation for marriage and love for your husband starts now. In your heart, and with eyes on the cross.

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